Part 1: ***
2023

I started this year by wearing a clown nose in an indoor pool. Then again in the shower. And once more in a river after a long walk. Each time I found the same sense of “home” in my body that I never feel when I think about the few geographical coordinates that I actually call home.

This poem came to me as I sat in this feeling of place and “no-place.” Do I have a place that is mine? Are there people from the past who guide me? Is there a “God” who sees me? It is a never ending cycle that I drown and resurface in. When one moment of clarity manages to break the surface a new blind spot pushes it back down.

These questions and reflections manifested as a site specific performance that then turned into a visual poem. This is dedicated to the questions I’ll never have an answer too.